


My Heart For Sale

by Kaiisan



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Retail, Angst and Humor, Cashier Lance, Eventual Romance, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, Keith doesn't even appear until chapter 3 sorry, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance focused, Lance has depression, Lance has minor health issues, Lance is based a lot on myself sorry, Lance-centric, M/M, Minor Injuries, POV Lance (Voltron), Physio exercises, References to Depression, Retail AU, Romance, Short Chapters, Shorts, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, depression and anxiety, it's mostly Lance for the main part, mechanic keith
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-06-18
Packaged: 2018-09-24 15:27:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9768101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaiisan/pseuds/Kaiisan
Summary: Lance should be a star athlete by now, making a name for himself and making his family proud.Instead, he's a part-time cashier in a general bargains store and honestly doesn't know what to do with himself.All of his friends are off living their own lives, and everyone else in his hometown have nothing to do with him.He's tired of being on his own all the time - he wants to change. He just doesn't know how.





	1. Sundays are Cursed Days

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so apologies if this is written very weirdly or badly or both!  
> I basically had an idea to write a story based on things that happen at my workplace? and things went from there haha.  
> It's a little odd but I hope you like it!

Sundays, Lance tells anyone who listens, are cursed. 

At least for him, he thinks, as his little brother’s phone wakes him at 5:38am with game notifications. The fourteen-year-old slaps a hand over it quickly and mutters an apology as Lance rolls over and tries to go back to sleep on the other side of the room, away from the noise and lights.

Eventually he gives up sleeping at about eight, and spends an hour or so on his phone, catching up on emails and notifications. The need to pee gets too strong to ignore after a while and now that he’s upright and done with that, he decides he might as well make breakfast for himself.  He can see through the kitchen into the living room, where Alex is on the couch, eating some toast whilst still on his phone, and Molly-Rose is sat in front of the TV watching cartoons, gulping down the milk from her cereal. When he turns the corner and spots the shelf with the cereal boxes, he realises why she was so quick.

“Seriously, Molly?” he groans. “You left a mess,  _ and _ you ate the rest of the Lucky Charms!” 

The eleven-year-old giggles sheepishly, and dashes past him to quickly wash her bowl in the sink like the good child she pretends to be.

“Where’s Mum?”

“Food shop!” Molly replies as she races back to the TV. “She’s making chicken-veggie soup tonight!”

He hums, cleaning up the crumbs of cereal from the counter and making a bowl of instant porridge instead. He adds a big squeeze of strawberry syrup to it to make it taste sweeter and eats reluctantly. 

Showering quickly, not willing to leave his siblings alone for long as they became more energetic. By the time he’s out of the shower a little after ten, Alex is barreling past him for his turn, which he knows is going to be forever, and Molly is asking for Lance to brush her hair. He dresses in his work pants and a simple tank top and dries his own hair first. 

Molly-Rose is the only McClain with red hair in the household. It’s from their father’s side, apparently, somewhere a few generations above them. It’s a dark coppery-brown, and it makes her blue eyes stand out brightly. Lance’s eyes are the same shade, though he’s sure his didn’t shine as brightly as hers.

He’s just finishing up the dutch braid on the right half of her head when their mum gets home with the shopping. Alex actually gets off his ass to help, and Lance joins them too as their mum flicks the kettle on and makes some tea. He talks with her for a while, helps put away food, and before he knows it it’s after 11 and he needs to get going. 

He hates getting ready for work. The dread builds up quickly and he can’t fight it, can’t protest. It’s sunny but with cold wind, his mother said just a few minutes ago. He stuffs his work shirt and lanyard into his backpack, as well as his wallet and a tightly-wrapped raincoat and his water bottle. By the time he has his shoes on and he’s out the door it’s nearly half past the hour and he needs to turn a 30 minute walk into a 20 minute one, so he’s cursing up a storm in his head. He can’t walk much faster than a brisk pace either; anything more strenuous sends a jolt through his hip as his tired joints warm up fast under the exercise. The first exercise of the day, considering he forgot to do his physio again.

 

(The jolting feeling in his hip goes away after a few minutes, but the pressure from his knees to his feet feels  _ wrong _ , like usual.)

 

Sundays are  _ definitely _ cursed, he thinks, as he weaves through the queues at the checkouts and flies through the staff door, up the stairs and throwing his things in a locker. People seem to think that everyone else takes Sunday off, and that no-one else would be out shopping on a Sunday. That, coupled with how  _ few _ shops were open on Sundays and the fact that they think it’s a great idea to bring in their damaged products for refunding on the shortest work day of the week just makes everything chaotic, and boy was Lance dreading it. He slides his work shirt on over his tank top, sprays some cool deodorant under his arms - walking fast made him  _ sweat like hell _ , no matter the weather forecast - and grabs his lanyard and bottle, shoving the rest into a locker and attaching his locker key behind his ID badge on his lanyard. He barely remembers to grab a pen and his bottle and work jacket before heading downstairs once more to clock in and jump into the fray of anxious shoppers. 

 

“No! No no no  _ no please not this again, _ ” he whispers as his till freezes, blinks, then shuts off completely. He whines, clutching the wad of twenty pound notes tightly in his hand as he tried to boot it back up again. The couple stood at the paying end of the till look concerned.

“What’s happened?” The man, a huge fellow that seems to tower over Lance’s meager 5’10 and slim stature, asks with a frown.

“I’m really sorry Sir!” Lance grimaces. “Something’s gone wrong with the till and it- it just shut down completely.”

“Well, did our shopping go through?” the man’s wife asks.

He shakes his head. “I-I don’t think so, the printer would have printed a receipt if it did…” he looks over his shoulders to see if he can spot his manager. “Ah, one second!  _ Allura!  _ I need your help.” 

Allura hears him over the crowded tills behind him and approaches quickly. Her long, silver-dyed hair would make other women her age look like ‘mutton dressed as lamb’, as the saying goes, however she pulls it off flawlessly, today’s style being straight-pressed and left loose around her shoulders. 

“What’s the matter, Lance?” she gives him a reassuring smile, and the anxiety in his chest goes down a little, though the hand clutching the money is still tight. She gives the checkout a lookover and immediately assesses the problem. “The till shut down? How odd.” She turns to the patrons waiting on the end of the checkout. “I’m sorry, this till has to be closed for the moment, if you could make your way to another one for the time being, that would be great.” She beams them a sugary sweet smile and they go without hassle, which is a gift Lance hopes he could achieve someday. 

“Lance, do you know if the transaction made it to total?” Allura asks once her attention returns to him.

He shakes his head. “I don’t think so, I just went to tap on ‘total’ and it froze before I could select anything further.” 

“Do you remember the amount the total came to?”

He winces. “Um, ninety-three pounds something?” He holds up his hand. “I have a hundred here.. Uh, what should I-” 

Allura takes it from him gently. “For now, close off your checkout. You’re still logged on and can’t do anything for the moment until it comes back on. Then help me bring this couple’s things over to Till 1.” She turns to the couple. “I’m afraid we’re going to have to re-scan your items on another till, if that’s okay with you.”

“Will it take long?” The man asks. “I’ve got a few minutes but I’m not gonna hang around for longer than that.”

Allura leads them away as they continue to talk, and Lance quickly closes the checkout with the pullout-banner that attaches to the checkout in front of his. He tries to restart his checkout a couple more times, and once it showed signs of coming back to life, he skips over to the first checkout, where he catches the end of the transaction, and everything has now been scanned through again and Allura hands the couple their change. The couple leaves without further comments.

“See,” he stage-whispers as Allura sorts out the notes in the till. “I told you Sundays were bad. Something always goes wrong for me on Sundays.”

Allura snorts at him. People are starting to queue at the till now that they were stood behind it. “It’s probably connected more to you rather than the day. Have you thought of that?”

Lance pouts.

“Ah, your till is back.” Allura points to where the 4th till’s screen blinks back into life as if nothing ever happened. “I’d like you to log onto this one now though, because I’ll have to do a spot check on #4 - make sure that the transaction didn’t actually go through - if it did we’ll be down by about a hundred pounds.”

Lance winces. “That’s… not good.”

“Nope.” Allura pats his shoulder. “It’s not your fault though - don’t worry about it.” 

 

(He does. It stresses him out to the point that he slowly puts one item through the till at a time so he doesn’t risk another one freezing on him again.)

 

The rest of his shift goes without a hitch, and a little after 4pm has him clocking out at closing time and leaving the stragglers for the cashiers who worked after-closing shifts. He grumbles his way up the stairs - his feet hurt an absurd amount, as usual - and once he collects his things he takes his wallet and phone and headphones out as he heads out again. 

“Hey Allura, am I still good to pick up a couple things?”

“Yeah, get what you need before I shut down the last till.”

“‘Kay.”

He does a quick tour of the shop, walking quickly  through the long aisles as he looked for what he needed. He  _ needed _ dry shampoo, because between him, his siblings and their mum they saved water if he went without a shower for a couple days longer than the rest of them - he can wash perfectly fine in the sink with a damp cloth. He also picks out a jar of chocolate spread for Alex and Molly’s sandwiches for their school lunches. And then he’s passing the sweets aisle and decides,  _ what the heck, I deserve a treat. _

He fills a small cup with milk bottles and sour watermelon candy, two of his favourites, and heads to the checkout where Allura waits. 

 

(He aches the whole way home, but the sweet-sour taste of candy distracts him just enough.)


	2. Ache

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update #2 that was already written lmao

Ache.

That's the only word he can use to describe everything he feels this Friday.

Mid-February is the coldest time of year. The temperature is barely above 4 degrees Celsius when he wakes and he stubbornly refuses to leave his bed until an hour before he needs to leave, eating and showering quickly. He has tonight to look forward to at least: his co-worker, a cute girl by the name of Mitch is holding a get together with some others and reserved a table at a Chinese buffet place, and they were all gonna get drinks after.

It felt nice to be invited.

 

(He didn't flirt with her. She may be tiny but he's 100% sure she could bench him if she wanted to.)

 

The cold seeps far too easily into his clothes and under his skin, the ache in his right ankle amplifying harshly. He tries to keep his weight off it at work, borrowing a spare office chair even though he guiltily stands once the ache lessens every few minutes because he knows they're supposed to stand at the checkouts.

The cold doesn't leave no matter how often he massages his knee or ankle between serving people. What's worse is that his wrist is acting up too, and heavy items are suddenly much more difficult to handle and scan. His massaging only does so much when he keeps having to use it, and no matter how much he whines to Allura, there's nothing she can do for him either.

Halfway through his shift, Mitch comes in looking thoroughly unhappy, and explains that the boss guy Alfor asked her in to cover a shift, which means the night out is cancelled. She seems upset by this which dampens Lance’s own feelings, and he thinks to get her something after his shift.

 

(At some point a Beatrix Potter 50p ends up in his till, and this time his whining to Allura plays out - she lends him the change to swap it out and add it to his own collection with the promise of paying her back tomorrow.)

 

His shift ends a little after 5 - and he catches Mitch out on the shop floor, persuades her to pick out some chocolates for him to buy her to make up for her failed night out. She thanks him as he pays for it and leaves it with her jacket behind the counter. 

 

(He gets Subway on the way home; he's  collected more than enough points for a  free sub or two at this point.)

 

He can't sleep. It's cold, he aches, his ankle and knee toe the line between aching and painful like always and the moon outside was too beautiful to ignore, anyway. It's a full moon, and several facebook posts implied a lunar eclipse at some point, though he was yet to see it. In the back of his head, the same mantra plays:  _ ache, ache, ache. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <333


	3. Green Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith finally makes an appearance, briefly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KEITH IS HERE.

Lance hates working the weekend.

He hates that his shift is the busiest, from late midday to early evening and everyone and their mother goes to shop. It’s fair to say that he doesn’t hate the people, he actually enjoys interacting with them 80% of the time, he likes hearing snippets of people’s day and comment on foods he’s tried himself from their shopping. It’s just that it’s almost constant with no breaks for four-to-five hours at a time.

An older colleague, a redhead named Trish, talks back and forth with him in between customers about tomorrow’s stock count, which he’s dreading. They’ll be spending an unknown amount of time just...counting. Counting _all_ the products out on shelving one-by-one and writing down numbers and.. Well, he doesn’t know what else, but he knows that Alfor said that it had taken his previous team until 2am to complete it, and he really didn’t want to stay for that long even if he’s getting paid for it.

 

* * *

 

A gentleman appears at the till during a quiet moment towards the end of his shift, almost guiltily holding up a bag with an item inside and a receipt. He’s undeniably attractive, with short salt-and-pepper hair that looked more like a fashion style than from age, and a deepset scar across his nose that only added to his physique. He’s firmly built, though he moves with a grace that surprises Lance.

“Hi,” he begins, and Lance leans against the checkout to hide his swoon at the man’s deep voice. “I need to return something, I’m afraid.”

“No problem Sir, is there anything wrong with it?” Lance beams a sunny smile at him and gestures for him to set it on the counter. The man takes the item - an unopened tin of paint - and sets it on the conveyor belt.

“No, it’s just the wrong kind. I own the garage a couple doors down?” he waits for a confirmation from Lance that yes, he knows which building he means, then continues. “We’re redecorating a little, and I asked my little brother to get some more matte finish paint in this colour, but uh, he got silk shine.” He scratches his head sheepishly.

“Ah, well that’s no problem at all,” Lance smiles, enraptured in the man’s soft and polite personality. “If it’s just a swap you need to do, you can go ahead and grab the right paint and we can do an exchange easily. Did you want to buy anything else while you’re here?”

“Oh, yeah. I do have a few other things to get I suppose.”

“That’s fine, you can leave the paint and the receipt with me, and we can sort it out when you’re done shopping.” He takes both items from the conveyor belt and stashes it by his feet under the counter.

“Thank you, um,” he leans forward to read Lance’s name tag. “Lance?”

“Yep! No problem.” They exchange smiles and the man grabs a basket from the end of the checkout and goes on to shop.

Lance immediately whirls around to fan himself at Trish. “Did you see what I saw? Because damn,”

“He’s probably old enough to be your father, Lance.” Trish smirks at him with a shake of her head.

“Well, let’s just say I understand why some people have a daddy kink.”

She wrinkles her nose in disgust as Lance laughs and laughs.

 

* * *

 

Salt-and-Pepper Daddy, as Lance nicknamed him in his head, returns with a basket of shopping just before closing, and he’s followed this time by a younger man more Lance’s age. His dark hair was tied back in a high ponytail, with wisps of hair coming loose across his face and framing his eyes. Lance safely assumed this was the younger brother, because attractiveness seems to be a family trait with those two.

“Hi again!” Lance chirps brightly, and begins ringing through their shopping. “Did ya find everything you needed?”

“Sure did, thanks.” The man, who Lance now notices is also wearing an ID tag, like his brother, smiles at him, and between items catches the name - or nickname? - “Shiro” on the tag.

“Have you got the right paint now too?” He glances at the younger brother with a grin, and is met with a confused scowl.

“Yeah, we’ve got it now, no thanks to Keith.” Shiro grins back at his brother too, whose scowl deepens as he realises he’d been talked about behind his back.

“It’s not my fault you didn’t specify ‘matte’ in the note you gave me,” he mutters, and his dark eyes brighten when he hears Lance giggle. He quickly shuts his mouth; some customers don’t like it when he involves himself with their chatter.

He quickly calls Allura over to do the return at the end of the transaction, which takes some of the price off of their current shopping. As he waits for her, he puts the last item - a bottle of green tea - through the scanner, though as usual, it doesn’t work.

“Sorry, one second.” he says, reaching under the till for a notebook. “This brand won’t scan for some reason.” He flicks through the book for the short code, and begins typing it in.

“Typical Keith,” Shiro mutters. “The one thing you pick and it doesn’t even scan.”

“It’s not like I did it on purpose.” Keith pinches Shiro’s arm. Shiro pouts. “You can hardly ever find this brand anywhere.”

“It’s pretty good,” Lance agrees. “We sell the pomegranate one too, though it sells out fast. My favourite is the watermelon one, which we don’t have unfortunately.”

Allura comes over at that point, and Shiro’s attention is diverted to her, and they get along great as they talk through the return. Lance is stood to the side, near to Keith and the shopping bags.

“This is the first time I’ve found the brand since we’ve moved down here,” Keith says quietly, as if he’s hesitant to talk to Lance without Shiro being part of the conversation.

Lance blinks at him. “Not local?”

Keith shakes his head. It goes quiet for a moment, neither knowing what to say. Keith’s focus lands on his brother, smiling and chatting with Allura.

“There’s one other place.” Lance mentions. Keith’s attention flicks back to him with interest. “The fresh fruit and vegetable shop in the pedestrian street in town? You know which I mean?”

Keith nods with a very small quirk of his mouth.

“They’ve got a whole bunch of flavours of this brand,” Lance continues, struggling to keep eye contact with the guy in front of him, nervous bubbles popping in his stomach. “I get the watermelon one from there, and they have a few others too.”

“Cool, I’ll have a look, thanks.” Keith nods again and gives him a tiny smile.

Lance ducks his head bashfully, leaning against the counter. Cheekily, he adds, “Yeah, I’m just promoting another store right in front of my supervisor, but I don’t think she pays attention to me, so don’t mind it, right Allura?”

“Hmm? What was that Lance?” Allura was playing with her hair as she turned to listen to him, though Lance was already giggling and shaking his head.

“Nevermind, don’t worry about it.”

Keith smirks as well. Lance counts that as a win.

 

(Trish gives him a lift home a little while later, on the promise that he bakes some cookies for tomorrow’s long shift. Which goes surprisingly well, and several of his coworkers thank him for the treats as they leave at the early hour of 7.30pm that Sunday.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last pre-written update! From now on updates will be every couple of days?? Ish?? It updates when something interesting happens at my work, really. That or I have an idea to give the fic more depth.  
> It's more like a mood diary for Lance or something but I promise I'll try and flesh it out a bit more.
> 
> Comments would make me super happy !
> 
> PS for actual decent klance romance check out my fic Stay the Night I promise I put x10 more effort into it compared to my work related rambles.


	4. Notes

Sometimes days pass in a blur to Lance. He can hardly tell them apart if it weren’t for the fact that the date changes on his phone and he eats and sleeps in between shifts. Working a three-day-weekend and a couple weekday shifts every week isn’t exactly hard, he knows this, but with little else going on in his life it takes up a lot of his energy. 

The week after the stock count passes him by so quickly he can summarize it into four small events. He rolls a pen around in his grip as he tries to write these events down accurately in the A6 notebook he keeps in his work bag. It helps him keep track of his hours and little interesting things that happen to try and stop him from merging everything into one forgotten memory. 

 

_ -Beccy announced that she’s having a baby boy on Friday. I forgot that I was going to bring her cookies. _

_ -I also forgot to bring my uniform shirt with me and had to wear my hoodie under my fleece jacket. It was warm and comfy. _

_ -On Saturday I remembered to give Beccy her cookies! And a customer accidentally tipped their shopping basket over and a big bucket of paint (and a bottle of some weird black goop - looked like BBQ sauce but?? Who knows.) spilled all over the floor. The battle of Coran vs Sunshine Yellow Silk Finish was long, smelly, and kind of gross, but the mustachioed man won after a literal hour of scrubbing and some minor splatters wiped into his jeans. The blue floor now has a greenish stain to it in that area. _

_ -On Sunday an older couple bought puppy food and stuff and the man had a puppy!! Tucked into his jacket!! An 8 week old Springer Spaniel, so small. Yawned a lot and nibbled my fingers 10/10 the cutest pupper. I told them about clicker training and how to encourage puppies not to nip and I hope I see them again.  _

 

He vaguely remembers seeing the brothers from the garage too, though he can’t recall anything of interest besides the older one Shiro buying a sandwich, and Keith going to the till behind him. He spends what feels like hours staring down at his little notebook, wishing he wasn’t so dull and lifeless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im beginning to think this fic isnt gonna be that great unless i add more to it... but that takes up so much more time than rambling...


	5. March

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After starting this I realise my life isn't all that interesting, so I'm gonna add some plot to it to make it more enjoyable. Lance's depression, anxiety, problems and retail-related incidents will still -mostly- be based on myself or my workplace, but anything Keith/Shiro/anything hinting to romance or further plot will be entirely fiction.  
> (AKA i have no love life to speak about and lets face it we're all here for the eventual Klance)

Spring is making its way into focus, with the increase of rain spells and a whole lot of Easter chocolates located all over the shop. Mother’s Day, too, which is significantly closer, though the chocolate eggs have an entire wall to themselves in comparison to a couple of shelves and a pop-up shelf of cards by the checkouts. 

With the rain comes the realisation that Lance needed new shoes. He knew his old boots were starting to fall apart, they had holes along the crease where he’d been crouching whilst stocking shelves, and the heels had been peeling off - but now the extra waterproof layers were peeling as well, and while he really didn’t want to spend the money, he hated wet feet just as much.

Towards the end of his shift, he gets a little agitated, ready to go home. His mum said she might stop by, they’d look for some presents for a friend and maybe go eat together. It was a nice change - maybe she’d even have some cash for a bus home instead of walking. He’d love that; his muscles ached with his new routine at the gym - his physiotherapist suggested it since his regular exercises weren’t working on their own. It makes his knees feel even weaker than before but he knows that his whole body will benefit from it… eventually.

Keith and Shiro stop by a few minutes before he finishes, waiting in his line as he puts a woman’s shopping through and handing her kid things to put in the shopping bag. He’s not really paying attention, and when a sack of fire logs tips suddenly he launches forward to save a glass jar from going over the edge, gasping in an admittedly high-pitch as he catches it just in time. He hears two more gasps as both the woman and Shiro, who was directly after her, see his stunt.

“Shit,” Lance mutters, a couple breathy laughs escaping as his heart has a mini attack, and he quickly puts the jar through the scanner and safely on the other side. “That was a close one, huh?” he says louder this time, grinning fakely as he tries to will himself to calm down again. 

“Those were some great reflexes!” The woman says appreciatively.

“Thank you,” the words come out automatically, though Lance doesn’t add that it was his fault for knocking the logs into it in the first place.

As he finishes with the logs and the kid’s sweets, he catches Shiro’s eye and receives a small grin and nod, like he’d also seen him save the day. Keith, behind him, simply stares, and he looks away to hand the kid the bag of easter goodies.

“These mini eggs..” the kid mutters, holding the egg-shaped chocolates to his chest, “are my  _ destiny. _ ” 

Lance tries not to look a little freaked out as the kid begins to spew a garble of words and helps the lady pay on her card, and afterwards helps the brothers pay for their late  lunch quietly and with little smalltalk.

 

Once he signs off and collects his things, he waits outside on the shop’s corner for his mother, playing music through his headphones. There was a PC shop set a little ways behind him, allowing a small carpark along his store’s wall, and on the other side of the PC shop was Shiro’s Garage, where the two brothers worked. It was on the very edge of the shopping lot, and had garages around the side that was separated from the main road by a low brick wall. He could see into the front windows of the shop, but they were tinted and couldn’t tell who it was he could see inside. His phone vibrates.

 

> _ Sorry darling your sister is sick so I’m picking her up from her friend’s house - dinner will be ready for you when you get home xx _

 

He sighs. He can’t be mad - he’d never put himself before his siblings if he could. He was an adult - a barely functioning one, but still - and they were still kids and he doesn’t want them to feel like they had to do things on their own like he did. Besides, his mum was still making dinner, which is more than he could ask of her to do, and it sure beats a can of spaghetti hoops if he were on his own. 

He sighs again, locking his phone and turning up his music, and begins his walk home, not realising that as he made his way past the garages, singing along to one of his slightly angstier rock songs, that someone was there, listening curiously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry the chapters aren't really more in depth!  
> I'm currently writing for a klance zine!! So all my focus is on researching things for that and making sure its perfect.  
> If you wanna read more of my stuff I have a completed Klance fic, Dance in the Dark, as well as a couple one shots (Klance and Heith) and a pretty big, in-progress Klance fic called Stay The Night if you wanna read them!  
> If you wanna hit me up on social media I'm Kaiisan_ on twitter!  
> comments would be great <3
> 
> (in case you're curious the song he's singing is Scars by I Prevail.)


	6. True Blues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, my life has been a mess recently and I'm taking it out on my poor son Lance... the next couple of chapters might be a bit rough on him.

The old Lance had a lot more confidence than the current Lance. Old Lance was always one of the lads, he could get along with anyone of any age, a true charmer. Granted his charms never really worked on the girls at his school, but it never bothered him in the slightest. He could make friends with them at least, and he was always invited to their gossip sessions and shopping trips. His role in the school track team had carved a blissfully easy ride through high school and he was all too aware of that now, roughly three years later. 

Lance feels loneliness all the way down into his aching bones. He feels isolated, and he knows it’s partially his fault at least. He’s withdrawn into himself, hiding away from the world in his bedroom when he doesn’t need to be outside, and not having many friends in town added to his lack of interest in the outside world. He had exactly one friend that was not away at university, Shay, who he’d known from school but hadn’t been close to until he moved back to town last year. They worked full time and had many friends to split their free time between, and while they regularly exchanged Snapchats and liked each other’s social media, Lance was lucky if he could see them once every couple of weeks.

His best friend of over ten years, Hunk, was in London at university, studying some over complicated courses and managing a student cooking club and other social graces that seemed to both aggravate and soothe his anxiety depending on the people he was with. He finds that he hardly hears from him nowadays and was upset to find out the other day that he’d come back to town for a couple of nights to see his family and stay a night with Shay. Yes, he knew that they were dating and trying to keep a long distance relationship going, but surely they could’ve invited him over for an hour or so too? He was good friends with both of them after all?

 

(Hunk was already back on the train to London by the time Lance had seen his Snapchat story of himself and Shay from the night before, leaving Lance’s emotions slightly misplaced and nowhere to direct them.)

 

Lance has been single for a few months too now, making the loneliness even lonelier with no-one to share his thoughts with. Of course, why would someone as successful and beautiful as Nyma stay with a dropout like him? It hurt when they broke up, even though Lance had been the one to do it - he knew she would move on after all, and he was proven right 2 weeks after the fact.

It’s been months since then, and since his small breakdown over a dating app (someone sending you a message saying they know where you work is  _ creepy _ , ok, especially if they don’t even say hi first), and while he still feels anxious about talking to strangers he wants to try.

His first attempt starts off okay. A young man in motorbike gear brings his shopping to the till, leaving his brightly coloured helmet in the trolley. He doesn’t understand how he went from calling it ‘interesting’ to calling it ‘unsurprisingly cheap-looking’ in the time he scans his handful of items, but the dude leaves with a silent, awkward nod and Lance wants to crawl under his register and make frustrated noises. 

The second attempt another guy his age brings car spray paint to his register and when the automatic ID request comes up, the guy stammers that he doesn’t have it on him, but he’s definitely 20 and just wants to spray the wheels of his car. Lance believes him after a moment of scrutiny, and in an attempt to make the guy laugh he says he’ll ‘trust him just this once, but if he hears anything in the news he’ll be in trouble’ and the guy does laugh a little, though his friends are giving him jabs and stifled giggles as he shuffles off with his purchase and Lance realises he had sounded mildly threatening and creepy. But oh well, because he looks like a sleep-deprived beanpole and can’t even  _ run _ , let alone suggest a fight. 

 

(He looks up dating apps when he gets home, looking over reviews and building up unwanted anxiety. He shuts his phone and goes to bed early, and alone.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any comments would be appreciated <3  
> check out my other fics if you'd like more klance content <3


	7. Rain and Saltwater

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for light description of panic attacks and difficulty breathing.

Today isn’t going great. 

For a start it’s busy - queues are going down the aisles again and there’s four checkouts open doing their best but it’s One Of Those Days and they’re bearing with it as best as they can.. Then there’s the fact that someone apparently dropped a ten litre bucket of shit-brown paint which has gone  _ everywhere _ . Barcodes are missing on several items and all in all, there’s so much rushing around that it’s starting to make Lance’s head hurt. 

A familiar face appears as the next customer in line, a short woman by the name of Telle who he knew through Shay. They make happy conversation as he scans her things, until she brings up some surprising news.

“I’m surprised you weren’t out last night!” she swipes at her phone, replying to her latest message.

“What d’you mean?” he frowns in response.

“We were all at Shay’s last night! Even Hunk and Rax, we had a get together.” She looks up at him for a moment quizzingly. “Didn’t you know?”

Lance shook his head mutely. Telle frowns at this and pays for her things.

Hunk was back from uni again. And didn’t say anything,  _ again _ . And went to see Shay  _ again _ . And met up with other friends  _ again. _

There’s a sharp pain in his chest above his heart and it clenches at the thought that maybe, maybe Hunk didn’t want to see him. 

It digs into him, and it takes a lot of his effort to stay standing straight, keep his customer service smile on his face, to not crumple up into a ball and cry. He feels sick, all the way down into his bones with nausea and he tries hard not get sent home for it because he can see Allura eyeing him from the staff room doors and when she’s asks him if he’s feeling well he can barely shrug. A mantra of  _ Hunk doesn’t want to see me _ plays over and over and he doesn’t think of anything else as he sits down on the offered chair Allura brings him with a packet of aspirin and a hushed request to tell her if he needs to go home. He feels worse for causing her concern, and carries on with his work.

 

* * *

 

The moment he leaves work, the tears fall like the rain around him. Like an unstoppable force, he makes it far enough down the street where no shoppers will hear him and  _ howls _ , wails mournfully as repressed emotions over his best friend let loose in his body and shakes him all over, he can barely stand still with the motions. He doubles over, trying to breathe through the sobs and the salt he can taste on his lips and god, it hurts so much to realise that the person you’ve depended on so heavily doesn’t see you in the same way. Hunk was his rock, his rational thoughts, his grounding when he dissociates and starts to cut off from reality; their late night skype calls kept him going through the shit that happened at college and Hunk  _ knew _ all this, surely; knew how much he meant to Lance.

Right?

He stays there in the rain until he’s soaked all the way through, and he doesn’t care, he’s crouched to the floor, cars are passing and occasionally sending up little splashes of water and he just… embraces it. He stays until he’s coherent enough to breathe between sobs, the panic attack subsiding into quiet drops mixing with the raindrops on his cheeks. 

The downpour lets up as he gets into town, and on his way up the street leading to his he sees caution tape closing off the junction and frowns.

“Am I alright to keep walking? I live just over there.” He asks a police officer as he approaches, eyeing the cars and the civilians talking to an officer with a clipboard.

“Sure, just stay well away from the area surrounding the accident.” She warns, then lifts the tape to let him pass. As he walks around the civilians, he recognises them as Shiro and Keith.

“Hey, you guys okay?” he calls out instinctively, catching their attention. Shiro looks vaguely uncomfortable with their talk to the officer, and he’s holding his arm oddly, but he gives Lance a brief smile and nod before continuing his report to the officer. Next to him, Keith glares over at the brunet, split lip smudged with drying blood, and his hair and clothes are a mess from a fight.

“Mind your fucking business.” He snarls, turning sharply away from the blue-eyed boy, earning a rough kick in the shin from his brother, though Shiro barely spares him an apologetic glance before he too breaks eye contact and turns his attention away again. 

It feels like a slap in the face. Evidently nobody wants anything to do with him at the moment.

He goes home in silence, feeling his emotional distress build up once again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so the one klance zine im in is nearly done! I've submitted my finished piece!  
> and now im in ANOTHER ZINE! It's a writer's zine called Aphelion! It's all pairings, platonic and romantic, and gen fics too. There's 80+ of us!!   
> I'm writing two fics for it, a klance and a platonic Keith and Pidge friendship fic. I'm super excited to be working on it!  
> Besides that, I might join the Klance Big Bang at the end of the month, which is a 15k minimum fic challenge?? thing?? whatever its great  
> So now im trying to update as many things as possible before I work on those lmao
> 
> My life is actually pretty ok atm, this chapter is based on something that's happened to me about a month ago now with my very important best friend, and well, it wont be getting better just yet. Stay tuned - not sure when I'll next update but it might not be a happy one for lance LOL


	8. Numb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Small chapters because revisiting this upsetting event in my life in order to rewrite it as Lance and Hunk makes me sad again so... it'll be done in the next chapter or two.

Lance takes a day off the following day. He got texts from Hunk and Shay some time during the night, both of them apologising for the night before, explanations a dime a dozen between the pair of them but he’s too tired to read through them. He can't read them without crying, anyway; so he calls into work with a realistic nasally voice due to his tear-stuffed eyes and nose and goes back to bed. Shay leaves him alone after a while, but Hunk persists with texts and calls throughout the day until in the evening he appears at Lance's home.

His mother lets him in with little concern to their troubles, and ushers Alex and Molly-Rose out onto the balcony at the other end of their apartment so that they had the most privacy they could get. 

"I'm sorry," Hunk says, and Lance doesn't have the energy to stop the tears from flowing as his best friend sweeps him up into his strong, muscular arms. 

Normally he'd feel so relieved by this, his saviour turning up when he needs him the most, only the problem was that it didn't feel like he was being saved anymore. He just feels numb and cold and tired.

"Forget it." Lance mutters, leading them sluggishly back into his room, setting up the anime the two of them had been watching sporadically together whenever they had the time, mechanical movements doing nothing to ease Hunk's tense frame as he sits down gingerly on the bed.

"No, I did wrong by you." Hunk insists, and it makes Lance look at him despite his sore eyes. "I had so much going on from the moment I got back that I just let myself get swept up in the current, I wasn't even meant to being seeing Shay yet, or the others, it was a last minute thing. Rax had a problem and he came to me for help, which isn't a normal occurrence so naturally I thought it was something important so we had a meeting that kind of went on for a lot longer than planned, and in the end we watched a movie to wind down, and well.. it turned into a thing," Hunk looks appropriately upset, and Lance knows deep within his heart that Hunk genuinely feels upset for hurting his feelings, for not being a good friend, but instead he can only smile bitterly and nod. 

"You're a busy guy, I know." Lance keeps nodding numbly, focusing on setting up the episode of the anime show. "I understand. You're always kind and people go to you for help and advice all the time, this isn't unusual. I know because you helped me all the goddamn time before, I should have paid you instead of my therapist, because you fixed more of my problems for me than she ever did. So I just wanted to know if and when you'd be back in town and if you wanted to hang out, but I guess other things just 'turn up' first sometimes right?"

He's being insanely petty about this, he can feel it. He can feel how Hunk's sad eyes burn into his skin and it makes the tears fall harder and he can't stop his lungs from pulling in deep, shuddering gasps of air. 

"It's just that, even though I'm stronger now, maybe I still need you too, you know." Lance whispers, and this time he doesn't feel as numb when his best friend pulls him into a crushing hug and cries with him, the anime playing dramatic English dubbed voices and action music to accompany them. 

 

They end up re-watching the episode after they're done crying - it's a great show after all, thanks to how ridiculous voice-overs and general theme, and the relief of getting those emotions off his chest leads from one shitty mood to another - the realisation that even though they both mean a lot to each other, he and Hunk were never going to be that close again. They didn't tell each other everything anymore - even now Hunk was sending off messages to people he didn't know every few minutes and when questioned, just shrugs and says 'uni people' like it's no big deal. Their routine since Lance moved back dwindled down to occasionally talking about anime or characters for Lance's perpetually half-thought-out book idea and that's about it. No late night Skype calls, no texts or long silly Facebook messages. Hunk leaves after the second episode they watch that night and promises he'll message more, but the moment he's out of the gate and walking down the street he has his phone in his hands once more, heading in the direction of Shay's house with eager speed.

Lance shuts the door and goes back to bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stay safe everyone <3


	9. Summer Onset

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey SO  
> im sorry but im kinda super busy??  
> lots of things to write yadda yadda welp

It’s becoming unbearably warm at the shop.

April gives way to May, and as the weather brightens and gets sunnier by the hour, the business of the shop increases drastically. The stock switches to more summery products - camping equipment and tents and garden furniture and inflatable swimming pools. 

Hunk disappears again, a couple weeks after they’d last spoken. He hears from Shay occasionally on how he’s doing but at this point the subject makes him feel numb so he shrugs off her worry. Instead he spends his time working or reading or sleeping on the beach when it’s not too burning hot outside.

Shay and her roommate are in the middle of adopting a cat, an older girl named Balmera. She’s a snowshoe, a little crosseyed, and has the more adorable scratchy meow and Lance keeps getting snapchats of the girls playing with her at the shelter and how eager they are to take her home. In all honesty Lance would love to hang out with them, but they can only go on weekends and that’s when he usually works. 

It’s been weeks since he’d last seen the mechanic brothers too. Sometimes he’ll wonder on what happened that night with the police, and there’d been some speculation on his facebook too from local news reporting pages about an attack, but it didn’t include any names and he could only guess it might’ve been them. A lot of the older generation didn’t welcome newcomers, since they took away a lot of local business half the time, but mostly people didn’t really care. 

He’s just thinking about this when the brothers appear, entering the building and moving down through the guided aisles and away from the tills. Shiro’s arm is in a sling, which is concerning considering how long ago it’d been since the possible attack, and Keith looks grumpy but otherwise healed. At the very least, the two men look happy and cheerful enough in their overalls with the arms tied at the waist, and grease-stained vest tops clinging to their backs as they walk around a corner and out of sight.

Lance tries hard not to look out for them as the usual after-school rush happens as it usually does, and when one of the brothers appears next in the queue he almost doesn't notice, if it weren't for the signature lunch shopping items - honey green tea, ready salted crisps, chicken bites and a packet of cola bottle gummy sweets - and the fact that a hand hesitantly reaches out towards his downturned face as he scans them.

"Hey, um..?"

The voice is quiet and unsure, and it makes Lance glance upwards at the younger brother in front of him. It takes him a moment to realise the odd look on Keith's face is him trying to read his name tag and suppresses a sigh.

"My name's Lance, sir." Lance beams a tight-lipped smile at him, absolutely too hot and bothered to be moody about the fact that the guy who swore at him the last time they spoke doesn't even remember his name. He scans the last couple of items through as Keith goes silent again.

"I'm sorry about before, Lance." Keith says after a moment, whilst Lance flicks through the notebook to find the code for the green tea, which still doesn't want to scan.

"It's not a problem at all!" Lance replies cheerfully, his customer service personality in full swing. "Ah-hah! There we go," he types in the code for the tea and sets it with the rest of the items. "That'll be three pounds and fifty-nine pence, please."

Keith is frowning at him, a mix of irritation and uncertainty fixed on his face, presumably at the fake upbeat persona Lance is using, but he can't show how he really feels surrounded by customers. Honestly he'd love to tell Keith that his apology felt forced and shallow, and that it'd been so long since the incident he shouldn't have bothered, but more than that he wants to ask him why he's bothering now of all times.

He sighs under his breath as he watches Keith scrounge in his pockets for the change, and at the man's curious glance he sighs again and says, "Seriously, it's all good, man. Don't worry about it."

Keith seems as unsure as before, but hands him four pound coins and collects his lunch items as Lance counts out his change and hands it to him with his receipt.

Lance puts his fake cheery smile back on as he waves him away, and as the younger brother reunites with Shiro the older gentleman gives him a nod and an apologetic smile too before they turn to leave.

His co-worker Mitch rounds her till and bounds up to him as he serves the next customer. "Salt'n'Pepper wanted me to send you his apologies for his rude little brother but it seems the  guy himself beat me to it, huh?"

"Mhmm, I guess so." Lance replies quickly, making sure to keep his main focus on the customer in front of him rather than his colleague, even if he'd much rather turn away and gossip.

"Did you know it was them that was involved in the accident that the Post wrote about? With the alleged attack on two random civilians?"

"No?"

"Yeah, apparently Shiro got jumped as he was parking his car, and Keith ran in to defend him, but Shiro got his arm all banged up."

"Keith got his face pretty banged up too," Lance murmurs under his breath, though Mitch unfortunately still hears it.

"So you saw them?"

"Yeah, Keith basically told me to go away, in not so nice terms."

"Damn, guess maybe he was embarrassed? Or still angry at the thugs."

"It doesn't matter, anyway." Lance shrugs, and due to the onslaught of customers Mitch goes back on her till and the matter is settled, for now.

In the meantime, Lance plays over all the questions he wants to ask Keith when he isn't working and stays silent unless he has to speak again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you like this you should read some of my BETTER STUFF:  
> -Dance in the Dark which is COMPLETE  
> -Stay the Night which is still on-going but tbh is a LOT better written than this bc that fic is my lifeblood right now i love it a lot  
> -if you like ONE PIECE go read Midwinter Song it's like 58k long and barely started ah hah hah...
> 
> NEWS:  
> -I'm in a klance zine called Intertwined Galaxies!! If you wanna get updates on that (it'll be available to purchase soon, and the money goes to charity!)then you can have a look at their twitter HERE: https://twitter.com/klancezine2017  
> -I'm in a writer's zine called Aphelion!! You can see more about it HERE: https://twitter.com/APHELIONzine  
> \----I'll be writing a klance fic and a Keith & Pidge platonic fic!  
> -I'm also in the Klance big bang!! 
> 
> Gosh darn there's so many things to do and write I'm sorry I'll probs be busy from now on~  
> Comments would be LOVELY and keep me going!

**Author's Note:**

> Comments would be super appreciated!! <33


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